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Many saw Pope Francis as a grandfatherly figure, especially when he shared bits of practical wisdom on how to get along with one another. Reflecting on the Holy Family’s simple life in Nazareth, on the 2013 feast of the Holy Family, Francis said:
“Let us remember the three key words for living in peace and joy in the family: ‘may I,’ ‘thank you,’ and ‘sorry.’ In our family, when we are not intrusive and ask ‘may I,’ in our family when we are not selfish and learn to say ‘thank you,’ and when in a family one realizes he has done something wrong and knows how to say ‘sorry,’ in that family there is peace and joy. Let us remember these three words.”
This advice became a refrain, as he advised the next year:
“It is normal that there be a quarrel between husband and wife … but please remember this: Never finish the day without making peace! Never, never, never! This is a secret, a secret to protect love and to make peace.”
Across many homilies, audiences, and off-the-cuff reflections throughout his papacy, Pope Francis offered such grandfatherly advice on marriage, family, youth, the elderly, and other aspects of Catholic life — using signature turns of phrase. Here are some highlights of other times he offered folksy advice to the faithful.
Marriage matters
The Holy Father was blunt when speaking to those gathered for a general audience in 2014 — criticizing those who had pets instead of children.
“The other day, I spoke about the demographic winter that exists nowadays: People do not want to have children, or just one and no more. And many couples do not have children because they do not want to, or they have just one because they do not want any more, but they have two dogs, two cats. … Yes, dogs and cats take the place of children. Yes, it is funny, I understand, but it is the reality. And this denial of fatherhood or motherhood diminishes us; it takes away our humanity. And in this way civilization becomes more aged and without humanity, because it loses the richness of fatherhood and motherhood. And our homeland suffers, as it does not have children, and, as someone said somewhat humorously, ‘And now that there are no children, who will pay the taxes for my pension? Who will take care of me?’ He laughed, but it is the truth. I ask of St. Joseph the grace to awaken consciences and to think about this: about having children.”
Young and old
Over the years, Pope Francis attended many youth-focused events — and he encouraged them to excellence.
“I wrote a speech for you, but prepared speeches are boring,” the pope told youth on his trip to Asunción, Paraguay, in 2015. So he spoke spontaneously. “We don’t want ‘namby-pambies,’ young people who are just there, lukewarm, unable to say either yes or no. We don’t want young people who tire quickly and who are always weary, with bored faces. We want young people who are strong. We want young people full of hope and strength. Why? Because they know Jesus, because they know God. Because they have a heart that is free.”
He was known for his colorful expressions when “telling it like it is.”
In September 2017, at the Vatican, Francis reminded a group of youth and young adults: “Narcissism produces sadness because you constantly worry about making up your soul every day, to appear better than what you are, pondering whether you are more beautiful than the others. It is the sickness of the mirror. Young people, break the mirror! Do not look in the mirror because the mirror is deceiving. Look outward; look at others; escape from this world, from this culture around us — to which you referred — which is consumeristic and narcissistic. And if one day you would like to look in the mirror, I will give you some advice: Look in the mirror to laugh at yourself. Try it one day: Look and begin to laugh at what you see there; it will refresh your soul. This brings cheerfulness and saves us from the temptation of narcissism.”
Speaking to an audience in May 2022, Francis focused on the elderly and told them they had plenty to offer, much more than money, and reminded them to pick up the Good Book, too. Summarizing the Old Testament Book of Judith, he emphasized: “Judith is not a pensioner who lives her emptiness in melancholy. She is a passionate elderly woman who fills the time God gives her with gifts. Remember: One of these days, take the Bible and look at the Book of Judith: It is very short; it is easy to read. It is 10 pages long, no more. Read this story of a courageous woman who ends up this way, with tenderness, generosity, a worthy woman. And this is how I would like all our grandmothers to be. All like this: courageous, wise, and who bequeath to us not money but the legacy of wisdom, sown in their grandchildren.”
Don’t be ‘pickled peppers’
The pope didn’t hold back when reminding the faithful of the call to witness to Christian joy.
“Sometimes these melancholic Christians’ faces have more in common with pickled peppers than the joy of having a beautiful life,” Pope Francis said in one of his earliest papal homilies, on the reading from Acts 18, in the chapel of St. Martha’s residence in May 2013. “If we keep this joy to ourselves, it will make us sick in the end; our hearts will grow old and wrinkled and our faces will no longer transmit that great joy, only nostalgia and melancholy, which is not healthy.”
“I tell you the truth,” he told the faithful in St. Peter’s Square. “I am convinced that if each one of us would purposely avoid gossip, at the end, we would become a saint! It’s a beautiful path!”
“Do we want to become saints? Yes or no?” he queried, as the crowds replied: “Yes!”
“Yes? Do we want to live attached to gossip as a habit?” Pope Francis continued. “Yes or no? No? OK, so we are in agreement! No gossip!”
This story was first published by the National Catholic Register, CNA’s sister news partner, and has been adapted by CNA.
